Becoming Strong by Laura Huey

Author:Laura Huey
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: University of Toronto Press

For some women, the feeling of being stuck was tied to their reliance on drugs or alcohol to help them cope with past trauma and present stressors, which often resulted in a cycle of inertia followed by despair. Jessie saw herself as “choos[ing] not to be sober” but could not articulate reasons for this “choice.” The untreated trauma she was struggling with, and her coping strategy of drugs and alcohol, caused her deep unhappiness, but she felt unable to make different “choices”: “I started doing other drugs … I don’t know why. I don’t know what’s wrong with me [crying]. I feel like I don’t even know me anymore.” Anisha also used drugs to cope, but had a firmer understanding of the causes of her addiction and the consequences of her usage. She admitted, “I went so long trying to get sober, but not really wanting to.” Anisha only went into treatment after losing her home, her job, and nearly her custody of her child. Shania was also stuck and admitted to using substances and social isolation during periods of depression: “I smoke, use drugs, and just pretty much be by myself.” Shania did, however, acknowledge that her method “doesn’t work” in that “it doesn’t relieve the pain and stress away. It just makes it worse.” By worse, she further admitted that she was “stuck.”

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